The Best News Is The Ball Is In The Women’s Court!

We need a little visual imagery here, so I want you to picture a glass being slowly filled for you. At first, you’re thinking, “It’s almost empty! This isn’t fair! Oh come on, look at this sad situation.” At some point, the glass is half-full and chances are you, me, and others are still in the complaining mode. We haven’t realized it’s reached the Tipping Point—changing from half-empty to half-full.

Well, guess what? We’re at the Tipping Point for women in business today. Since graduating from Berkeley at the height of the women’s movement protests, I’ve been monitoring our slow, slow, progress. Always looking forward to the day when women are treated as well as men. Of course, there’s always something that ‘s not quite equal—and we can focus on this—and see ourselves as victims . . . still.

There’s a wonderful word “epiphany” that I recently went through when I realized we’ve passed the half-empty marker, men—young men— are no longer the enemy—they’re eager to be our allies. We women are smart and we’re used to working hard, we can multitask easily, we can use our feminine secret tool, intuition, to our advantage. Talent-wise, we’re as good as men in business. But, there’s one thing we haven’t yet grasped—and it’s a doozey:  We are our own worst enemy!

I’m not happy with this either, don’t get defensive, stay with me here. First, let me tell you how women are not helping other women. And then, let me tell you how you can make a small change each week to help yourself and to help other women. Malcolm Gladwell, in his book The Tipping Point, did a good job of shining a spotlight on how ideas can be grasped by groups of people where each person links to several others and, suddenly, so much faster than you’d ever imagine possible, you’ve reached the Tipping Point—and a massive social change has taken place.

Well, we’ve reached the Tipping Point for Women! We’re teetering there and now I’ll tell you how you, yes YOU, can do just 2 little things and we’ll be looking at a full glass sooner than you thought possible!

Obstacle Avoidance
Here are the 2 things. Most businesses were set up by men—thank-you guys. All of us are used to seeing the winning team—the men—perform in a particular way—and it’s not the way we women would have designed it. This alone sets up conditions for obstacles—everyday obstacles—that trip up only the second team—the women’s team.

I maintain that we women are smart. We can learn to handle, and even avoid, these obstacles. In fact, after 20 to 30 years of working, you’d discover a number of these on your own. But patience is not a virtue—don’t buy into that platitude—it’s a waste of time for you and for other women. I vow to do my best to help you by alerting you to a business obstacle every week and giving you a strategy to short-circuit it! They’re simple, and because they’ll make sense to you, you’ll remember them. These have been tested by our audience on the WomensMedia website where we get more than 1,000 emails a day detailing what’s worked for these hard-working businesswomen.

Treat Women Equal To Men
So this obstacle avoidance is the first of the 2 things you must do to quickly bring the glass full up. Now, the other thing requires that you listen with an open mind. At first, you won’t like what you hear. I was kicking and screaming when I first read the research results—but it’s true:  Today, women are holding women back—it’s no longer the men! If you’re like me and require proof of the research, I refer you to the Max Planck Institute’s expansive study. Fake resumes for jobs were shown to men and women. The names on the resumes were changed back and forth between male and female names. More women than men held the female applicants back while recommending more men for positions, especially positions of authority. This is where I screamed, “Why are we doing this?”  Well, here’s what’s going on. Some of us hold the stereotype in our heads that men are managers and women are support staff. It’s hard to avoid stereotypes in the first few seconds, but we can unlearn them—and we will unlearn them! Some of us expect women to work twice as hard as men, because that’s what we had to do—so what, we can get over it!  We can get over it because we don’t want this situation to be around for our daughters and our granddaughters!

Tip:  So let’s get this Tipping Point ripping along. The Good News is the ball is in our court, and we’re smart. Let’s start avoiding obstacles and begin helping other women. Very soon we’ll be able to tell our daughters that men and women are truly equal in business. Let’s make this happen!

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Women Want A Job They Feel Good About—A Business With Good Intentions

“Right now you are one choice away from a new beginning—one that leads you toward becoming the fullest human being you can be.”
— Oprah Winfrey
We all know both men and women look for jobs so they can earn money. What surveys have found is that money is Number 1 for the men, and almost Number 1 for the women. Women place Doing Something Worthwhile above money. So if you’re a woman who’s unhappy with her current job, look for an Oprah job. By this I mean a job with good intentions. I remember when Oprah’s talk show was barreling along bringing in bags of money and suddenly she started doing some shows along the lines of Be A Credit To The Universe type of thinking. Her regular audience dwindled on those days at first. That was about the same time I started taping her show. Call me New Age-y . . .no comment. She has stuck to her vision and, guess what, the money has followed.
That’s sort of the scenario that took place at the company I founded with two friends, WomensMedia. The initial idea was to provide valuable information to working women—AND to make money. Fortunately, no one quit her day job. Every time we thought about selling information to women, we’d get emails from women in India, in the U.K., in the U.S. who could not afford anything. We’d say, “We’ll pass the hat around for a few more months of operating expenses.” Well, guess what? The money has followed. It turns out that advertising now pays the bills.
I have 3 options for those of you who are putting in valuable hours for work you’re not proud of.
1) Stay with your current company, but propose that you head up a new project that benefits the community or an important charitable effort. Perhaps there’s a tie-in to your company’s services. If you’re choosing this Door Number 1, put in some hours ahead of time to do it right: Research the effort, plan what your company can offer, estimate how much it will cost, detail the position you will assume, detail what parts of your current job will need to be taken over by someone else, and most importantly, talk about the Invaluable Good Will that will be forthcoming.
2) Door Number 2: Stay with your current company, but diligently look for another job with a worthwhile purpose. Which company? You decide. You know what you’d be proud to donate (meaning sell) your time to.
3) Door Number 3 is the door many women are choosing: Become an entrepreneur—follow your own good intentions. I’d like to say with conviction, “The money will follow.” but you have to prepare for the other case. Don’t quit your day job until you see the customers signing on the line. In fact, don’t quit your day job until their checks clear the bank. But maybe then you’ll be rewarded . . .like Oprah.
In case you need some thinking material, I suggest these two magazines: Worthwhile, and Pink. Think things over—and make a change.
Tip: If you picked Door Number 1, do your planning and earmark positions in your project for a couple other women in your company. Spread the good feelings around.

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How To Promote Yourself Without Bragging

It’s not bragging if you can back it up.
—Muhammad Ali

Ali can get away with bragging but we women can’t. We must walk a fine line between informative self-promotion and outright bragging. Most of us have been raised on the little girl admonitions, “It’s not nice to brag!” and “Who does she think she is?”  As long as these sayings are still playing in your mental background, you’ll feel uncomfortable when you know you’re bragging. And when you’re uncomfortable, other people focus on your discomfort. You don’t want that! The secret I can tell you is how to promote yourself just short of bragging. And that’s something you probably do want.

You need to self-promote—even if you’re not interviewing for a job. As you meet people they’re going to form split-second impressions of you. If you’re a woman, that may tend toward the sister, wife, mother, girlfriend, low-level employee, or helper images. Remember this and craft something in the beginning of a conversation that sets them in the right direction. I’ll tell you 2 simple ways to craft it in the tips of the week.

Meanwhile, for the guys who tell me they read this blog, women are not impressed the same way men are. For instance, men are often impressed when another man mentions his car by brand. Or, as I saw, a man left his Ferrari keys on the table during an entire dinner. For women, this type of display is too blatant. We don’t feel we should do it; we won’t allow other women to easily do it; and we see through it when men do it. You know, maybe we should ease up. Or not. On the other hand, women, if you’re talking only to men, you can take it up a notch without worry. Mention the private jet business trip you took, even if it was ages ago, and watch the men’s heads swivel around. Same thing with the 6-figure and 7-figure contracts your company is involved with. It will earn you respect. Just don’t try it with women.

Here’s the first tip for the week.


Tip 1:
Rather than saying, “I have …,” or “I can do …,” the secret is finding an item in the conversation that relates to your accomplishment. Then start with something like, “I learned X when I was faced with a problem at IBM. I had to…”  Talking about what you learned or experienced keeps you just short of bragging—right where you want to be.


Tip 2:
You know how comfortable you feel when you’re telling someone about a memorable vacation you took? I want you to take a piece of paper, right now, and jot down a list of items from your life or career that are memorable, including a few that are impressive. I want you to craft what Peggy Klaus calls a “bragalogue.”  Pretend you’re writing a screenplay that only includes the good parts. OK, throw in a couple missteps to show your humility (we still are expected to be somewhat humble) and to show your sense of humor. This is now Your Story—a story you enjoy talking about.

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Use Confident Language That Says, “I Can Do It!”

The “impostor syndrome” is more prevalent among women than men. You know, it’s that nagging feeling that any minute people will discover that you’re not up to a task. Relax, most of us feel that way when we accept a challenge—even a small one.

If you’re a woman, you know how often this self-doubt occupies your mind. It occupies a man’s mind too, but to a lesser extent. And, here’s the important fact, men don’t voice this OUT LOUD. You know what a man says when faced with self-doubt:  Of course, I can do it!

Now, the first tip for you is to stop vocalizing your self-doubt. The second tip is to substitute strong words for your weak vocabulary whenever you feel doubt creeping up.

Start substituting these phrases:

I know…
I’m convinced that…
I’m certain…


And stop uttering these phrases:

I’m not sure, but…
I feel…
I may be wrong, but…


Start bringing these phrases into the conversation—when they fit, of course:

a proven winner
take advantage of a unique opportunity
tell me what you need and I’ll take care of it
minimum risk and opens up possibilities
I’ll evaluate it
in my experience, response has been good
I’ll give it top priority


Tip:

 Let’s say you want to talk to your boss with full confidence—and no self-doubt showing. Words are not the only concern. Your body language must be strong as well. Here’s the scenario. Knock on your boss’ door. Enter with strength—not timidly—and make eye contact. Take a minute or two before being seated—there’s power is having your boss look up to you. Sit up straight. Only use your hands to make strong gestures—especially those with an upturned palm. Don’t let your hands fiddle with your hair or jewelry or pen. You know you can do a good job of this. Give it a try!

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Top Fortune 500 Companies Are Listening To Women Because It’s Good For Business

Just like the Fortune 500 companies, your company should be looking for ways to do better financially. Wouldn’t it be a kick if that turned out to be by promoting more women into upper management? Wouldn’t it be great if your stockholders thought this would also be good for their pockets? Well, the kicker is . . . it’s true! Now you need to get the word out. And to do that, you need proof. Catalyst, a New York-based research organization has provided the proof.

Catalyst found that Fortune 500 companies with the highest representation of women in their senior management teams had a 35 percent higher Return on Equity—a key measure of profitability—and a 34 percent higher Total Return to Shareholders—capital gains plus dividends—than companies with the lowest representation of women at the senior level.

So, promoting women up, way up, increases the bottom line. I hope you’re asking yourself, “Aren’t women being promoted?” For those of you, the resounding answer is “No.” Women are half our workforce and only 16%—that’s way less than half—of our upper management. There are many subtle obstacles that cause this situation. The Good News is these obstacles can avoided by smart women preparing for them and by smart companies taking an active role in removing them.

What could be the reasons for a financial upside to promoting women? Catalyst is careful not to try to guess at what causes these numbers. But I’m not shy, I’ll give you my thoughts. I believe women bring a different way of looking at things that a group of men may have overlooked. I’m not saying the men’s viewpoint is wrong, but asking them to consider a different direction, a different product, is valuable.

Also having more female role models will attract the best-qualified women to your company. Heather Arnet of the Post Gazette says, “Demonstrating a true commitment to paying women fair wages and providing opportunities for advancement within your corporate and board structure will enable your company to compete for the most qualified workers in the market.” And now more women than men are graduating from our universities: 6 out 10 college graduates are now women. We can’t ignore this skilled talent pool.

And also of financial importance is stemming the turnover of your female employees. As Mike Cook of Deloitte discovered (as reported in the Harvard Business Review), women were not leaving to start families, they were leaving because they saw men receiving the best new clients and men being promoted more rapidly. These practices have been curbed, and guess what, the women are staying.

It’s a novel turn of events that we now need to say, “Don’t promote women because it’s the right thing to do. Promote women because it’s good for the bottom line.”

Tip:  Get the word out. Refer your CEO to Deloitte, IBM, or Johnson & Johnson to see how they’re removing obstacles to promoting women and gaining the financial upper hand. If a woman would like to take some time off to start a family, these companies now offer a 1 to 5 year sabbatical (without pay) where they keep you informed and connected to the company. And yes, men can use this time off (for any reason) as well. If you’re running your own business, as many women today are, ask a man for his viewpoint—you may be surprised. Of course, if you’re the boss, you get to make the final decision.

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The Good News About Women And Leadership

They’re Finally Ready For Us!

What if you asked 2,250 adults across the U.S. who makes a better political leader, a man or a woman? And what if you divided leadership into 8 character traits?

Luckily for us, the Pew Research Center found the money and the people to fund a well-run survey asking these exact questions. What did they find? They found a paradox in our society.

They identified these 8 political leadership traits:

1. Honest
2. Intelligent
3. Hardworking
4. Decisive
5. Ambitious
6. Compassionate
7. Outgoing
8. Creative

And they got these results:

1. Honest                           Women             50% vs  20%
2. Intelligent                       Women             38% vs 14%
3. Hardworking                   Men and Women
4. Decisive                          Men                  44% vs  33%    
5. Ambitious                       Men and Women
6. Compassionate              Women             80% vs   5%     
7. Outgoing                        Women             47% vs  28%
8. Creative                         Women             62% vs  11%

The survey showed that people rated women as better leaders in 5 out of 8 categories, men in one category (decisive), and men and women equally in 2 categories (hardworking and ambitious).

This certainly is not the result the Pew Research Center would have found in the 1980’s. Times have changed.

Here’s the paradox:

Women have made great strides in educational attainment (6 out of 10 college degrees go to women) and women have achieved near equal participation in the U.S. workforce (46.5%), very few have made the jump to the highest levels of political leadership (17% in the Senate and a mysteriously equal 17% in the House) or corporate leadership (less than 3% of the Fortune 500 companies in 2008 had female CEO’s).

Is this the truth?

Are people fibbing when they take this survey, and they really don’t think women are good leaders, but it wouldn’t be politically correct to say this? Luckily again for us, the Pew Research Center wondered the same thing, so they conducted a second survey. They were given profiles of 2 candidates, Ann Clark and Andrew Clark who had similar characteristics, except for gender. How did each rank on their  “likeliness to vote scale?”  They came out the same! Gender no longer mattered. In fact, when it comes to assessments about character, the public’s gender stereotypes are actually pro-female.

Getting back to sports—

Women come out of this survey like a sports team that racks up better statistics but still loses the game. The 8-traits survey stats are women over men by 5 to 1, with 2 ties. Nearly all these gender evaluations are shared by men as well as women. Interesting.

Gender no longer matters (yea), so why do we have this shortfall (boo)?

A number of recent studies have shown that women do about as well as men once they actually run for office, but that many fewer women choose to run in the first place. Some people think this is because party leaders are reluctant to seek out women candidates, especially for highly competitive races. (This may be rapidly changing!)

A recent Brookings Institution study gives another explanation. It suggests that women may be constrained by their own shortfall in political ambition—which, the study theorizes, is the sum of several factors:

1. They have more negative attitudes than men about campaigning for office,
2. They under-value their own qualifications for office; and
3. They are more likely than men to be held back by family responsibilities.

My Tip of the Week involves some missionary work you can do, all for the benefit of women.


Tip:

Think hard about the 3 reasons women may not be stepping up for a political office. Could one of these be holding you back? Should it be holding you back? For instance, # 3, family responsibilities, look at the U.S. Senate and House right now. Quite a few of these women have raised families. You could start thinking about local positions you could hold now and ramp up later.

Perhaps there’s a woman you know who you’d like to see making responsible decisions in our government. Talk to other women and form a posse to convince her to run for office. I personally know of one woman, who had only held PTA positions, who said this happened to her. She said she was stunned, but the momentum kept building, and her confidence built right along with it. Today she’s a respected politician making careful decisions which help mold our society.

Think it over. Take a step. Or help another woman realize her potential. There’s something you can do!

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How To Handle A Gender Stereotype In Business

Starting out in rocket science and computer technology, I was often the only woman in the room.

That’s another way of saying, the stereotype others had of me didn’t fit with the group. I was well aware of these assumptions.

I’ll bet you’ve had the feeling—at one time or another—that people have stuck a stereotype or label on you that made you out to be less than you are.

You may have felt like an outsider to their groups.

In their minds they could be thinking:

• She’s not important,
• She’s not educated,
• She’s not capable,
• She’s not assertive,
• it could even be, “Oh, she’s a mother.” and further questions might end right there.

You can see how this limits the opportunities a person is willing to offer you.

It’s not a good feeling when it’s directed at you, is it? Why do these stereotypes keep popping up? Unfortunately, each of us has a little bucket in our brain that acts like an autopilot to help us survive. This would have been a good idea a long time ago, when you were being chased by a fast 4-legged creature with big teeth out on the Pleistocene Plain.

But today, this bucket is full of quite a few wrong assumptions.

Well the next question we need to ask is:  How do stereotypes die?

Let’s take a look at how scientists say a stereotype disappears in your brain.

1.  A stereotype disappears when it’s popped up enough times and you’ve been proven wrong

—or—

2.  A stereotype disappears when you’ve been terribly, terribly wrong—as in embarrassingly wrong.

What can you do to counter a negative (incorrect) stereotype about yourself that might pop up when you meet someone new? You know, when someone assumes you are less than you really are.

Here’s my Women in Business Tip, which deals with this.

Women in Business Tip of the Week:

This is unpleasant to think about, but you need to do this exercise once. You must think of how others might be stereotyping you. What negative or incorrect assumptions do you think they may be making? Yucky mental game, isn’t it? Well, this is all for your benefit.

After you pinpoint the stereotypes and labels, work up a few sub-comments to add when you introduce yourself to someone new. These sub-comments should be designed to directly contradict what the other person might be thinking. Trust your intuition as to which one would be most beneficial in each situation.

You can also do this with a stereotype-breaking action—you can go out of your way to be

more reasonable, more helpful, more intelligent than the other person might expect.

Don’t be naïve—be prepared! Now, get out there and cancel those stereotypes, one by one!

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5 Steps For Motivation

1.  Imagine you’re on your deathbed – an unpleasant enough visual to catch your attention, as it should. It makes you think about the shortness of life and the importance of doing things that are important to you. If you knew you might die soon, say next year, what things would you want to quickly begin accomplishing? Think about various facets of your life and pinpoint the 3 most important items for each.

2.  Drop pessimism. I especially want to talk to you if you look at whatever’s unsatisfactory in your life, and say, “That’s the way it is. Things are bad. I’m just being realistic.” If you don’t drop the pessimism, you’re squandering chances of success. Admit it, people with an optimistic outlook go farther. Others want to be around them—others want to help them. They have a headstart. Hey, it’s an attitude. You can change an attitude. Studies have shown that when people are told to intentionally smile, even if they don’t feel like it, they start feeling happier. And, people react to them in a more pleasant manner. It’s a vicious cycle (in a good way): You force yourself to smile, you feel better, others smile back at you, they feel better, they turn and smile at someone else—or do someone a favor, who then passes the favor on. That’s a vicious cycle we should strive for. Adopt a new attitude—your new mantra is “I’m an optimist at heart.”  Now and then bad things happen, even to optimists. Reframe these things. They are now Challenges—and you’re up to the Challenge. Right? Right!


3.  Take up acting. You know, act as if . Who is the role model for the life you want to lead? How does she talk, dress, carry herself? Aim high. Assume this is a class project—and you expect to get an A+ for your efforts. It’s interesting, the thoughts that go through your mind before you take an action register strongly in your subconscious. In fact, scientists say your subconscious can’t distinguish between imagined actions and real actions. This explains how an athlete can improve her game by adding visualization sessions. So, visualize yourself acting in a new manner. Start strengthening those new, improved brain circuits!

4.  Meet new people.  It’s stimulating to meet new people. Find out what they’re interested in—what they like to do. Tell them a little about yourself, but don’t hog the conversation. So often people are thinking about the next comment they want to make and consequently steer the conversation away from where the other person was headed. My Tip of the Week deals with this topic.

I’m frequently surprised that the impression I have of someone before I get to know them is way off base. Now, I try to give them a chance to change that first impression. I’m conditioning myself to not label people as Probably-An-Artist or Not-A-Serious-Business-Person before I give them a speaking chance. Who knows, they could be both! (I am.)


5.  Take baby steps at first. Sometimes we avoid going after a goal because it seems like such a big deal to undertake. This is one of the reasons we often procrastinate, saying, “I’m not quite ready to do that. I’m sure I will be soon.”  What if you decided to start right now, but with the intention to only do a teeny, tiny bit—only take a baby step? It might be to do an Internet search. This might give you the incentive to take one more baby step—maybe make a phone call. Those are easily doable, right? Each day that you find yourself leaning toward procrastination, take one more baby step.

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Are Mars-Venus Stereotypes Barriers To Women’s Advancement?

“Men and women aren’t planets apart, but their stereotypes sure are!”

                                                                        —Nancy Clark

In the recent past you could attract a lot of attention by saying women are different, very different, from men. It was a quick jump to assume that women are nurturing, and that maybe men are not—or that women show empathy, and men do not. It has become a sad state of affairs. As with all trends, this one went too far and now it’s time to reconsider.

It’s a known fact that there’s a wide range of traits and talents in the female population, just as there is in the male population. And these gender ranges overlap—don’t tell me you haven’t noticed that.

In general, there are slight, not huge, differences between the genders. And, as I said in Nature vs. Nurture, many of these are from conditioning, not from nature.

The huge differences are not “real” differences but are the differences in stereotypes for each gender. I can’t bear to list them or even say them out loud for fear it’ll give them more weight than they have now. They do add up to what Catalyst research shows is the current viewpoint:  Women take care, and men take charge. What does that give us? It gives us: Men are the executives, and women assist them. It gives us the statistics that I pointed out in How Bad Is The Gender Gap At Work?. The stats show us 85 % male executives in the top 2 tiers of the Fortune 500 companies.

Catalyst research shows that by creating false perceptions that women and men are “planets apart,” gender stereotyping often creates an environment where women are overlooked for top positions—regardless of the strength of their credentials. The statistics bear this out.

Does this mean a woman should mimic a man? No, a woman should stick with the leadership style she’s comfortable with—acting doesn’t do it. My tip of the week gives you a strategy for awakening your company to the benefits of removing stereotypes and other gender biases. It’s much better if your company realizes it wants to capitalize on female talent (and stop losing money when frustrated women leave). This is an opportunity whose time has come!

Here’s my tip of the week.

Tip:

Let your company know about the money-saving lesson a Fortune 500 company, Deloitte and Touche, learned. Mike Cook was worried about the number of women who left his company at the mid-management level. He asked his senior managers why this was happening. All of them said it was for “family reasons.” Fortunately, he looked into it further by tracking down the women who had left. The women were still working—some with competitors—some in other fields. The ones with families had started them before leaving Deloitte.

The real reason for leaving was that they saw no advancement for them and no role models in upper management. They were frustrated with the gender bias. This gender bias had a price—it was costing the company millions of dollars a year. Recruitment, training, and loss of productivity add up in dollars. The company is making strides to pinpoint and remove those gender biases. The benefit to the company is in the bottom line—and the women like it too!

Refer your bosses to an article about this success story in the Harvard Business Review. A success for your company will be a success for women as well!

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Double Standards For Men And Women?

Is She Too Strong? Too Pushy?


Instead of a lawsuit, I say shine a spotlight on double standards in the workplace. People will decide what’s not acceptable behavior. Public opinion brings rapid change, and that’s what I anticipate.
—Nancy Clark


In the Harvard Business Review, Nancy Nichols writes, “Women who attempt to fit themselves into a managerial role by acting like men . . . are forced to behave in a sexually dissonant way. They risk being characterized as ‘too aggressive,’ or worse, just plain ‘bitchy.’ Yet women who act like ladies, speaking indirectly and showing concern for others, risk being seen as ‘ineffective.’”

Women have been caught in a double bind. We’re not part of the #1 team in business—the men’s team. That’s the situation we have today. Let’s not bemoan it—that won’t give us progress. Let’s analyze it and see where we can carve away a few more steps. Kathleen Hall Jamieson tells us, “Binds draw their power from their capacity to simplify complexity. Faced with a complicated situation or behavior, the human tendency is to split apart and dichotomize its elements. So we contrast good and bad, strong and weak, for and against, true and false, and in so doing assume that a person can’t be both at once—or somewhere in between. Such distinctions are often useful. But when this tendency drives us to see life’s options or the choices available to women as polarities and irreconcilable opposites, those differences become troublesome.” Jamieson points out that over the years women have found new options to exercise, so don’t think of yourself as permanently shackled. She states, “Put simply, over time women have learned to turn potatoes into vichyssoise.”

When I’m asked about this problem, I say, “When you see double standards for men and women in action, all you need to do is bring attention to the matter—without anger. Most people will make their own judgment that this is unfair treatment. Those who don’t are not ready to change—this week.”

I don’t promote more laws and more lawsuits as the best way to proceed. Public opinion is ready to change en masse. Instead of a lawsuit, put a spotlight on double standards. Let people decide if this is acceptable behavior. Today we’re seeing that fathers and mothers are worried about sending their daughters out into a workplace that will disappoint them, year after year, with inequities.

Debra Meyerson of Stanford University tells us that if you want to make an effort to change the use of double standards, you have to speak up. For instance, “Jack and Mary both have clients who like them. Jack is arrogant and all you do is laugh about it. But Mary is not nearly as arrogant, yet you criticize her when she does any self-promoting. Why does he get higher marks at promotion time? Doesn’t this look like we’re using double standards? Is this fair?”

Tip:  Over the next week, look for instances of double standards being used for men and women in your workplace. Point out the problem without anger if possible. It’s very likely you can enlist a man to second this opinion. Honest, they’re out there ready to help!

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Self-Esteem: A Marriage of Confidence and Self-Respect

Written by Dianne Schilling

Monday, 05 October 2009 00:11

Self-esteem is not simply a matter of feeling good about yourself—though legions of motivational cheerleaders would have you believe so. The "feeling good" definition is far too simple—and largely unreliable. Too simple because it doesn't give you anything to work with. Unreliable because feelings are fleeting. The most unhappy, self-deprecating people feel good about themselves occasionally, but the feelings don't last. Feelings hardly ever last—they change in response to situations and events. In his acclaimed book, The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem, psychologist Nathaniel Brandon offers a far more substantive and challenging guide to achieving healthy self-esteem. Here is a very brief interpretation of Brandon's six pillars. (If you read Brandon's book, you'll get a chapter on each one.) 1. Live Consciously. Stay alert and involved in the present moment. Make mindful choices. Try not to slip into unconscious patterns of behavior. 2. Accept Yourself. Be realistic about your flaws and imperfections. Some you can change, of course, but first you have to make peace with them. Conversely, recognize and accept (never discount) your skills, talents and personal strengths. 3. Take Responsibility. Look out for yourself. Be accountable. Fulfill your obligations, and don't blame others for your problems. 4. Be Assertive. Say what you think, feel and believe. Ask for what you need and want. Declare your individuality without apology. 5. Live Purposefully. Regardless of the details, strive to maximize your potential. And remember, the choices you make determine who you are—and who you are is much more important than what you have. 6. Maintain Your Integrity. Adopt a code of conduct and live by it. Know exactly what your principles are, and stick to them, no matter what others think, say or do. As you can see, this approach requires considerably more effort than simply pasting affirmations to your mirror and repeating "I am loveable and capable" 20 times a day. Not that affirmations aren't helpful, but it should be obvious that if you don't believe a word you're saying, affirmations won't work. Furthermore, healthy self-esteem is never based on how thin or attractive you are, the size of your house or bank account, or even the prestige of your job. It's not like a pretty piece of acrylic you glue atop a weak, stubby nail. Healthy self-esteem—a blend of self-confidence and self-respect—must be firmly grounded in good character and individual accomplishments, large and small. Seven Ways to Build Self-Confidence Self-confidence accumulates and strengthens over time. You can fake confidence, and you may need to at times, but real confidence comes from a history of small victories and accomplishments that add up to an inner conviction that you can handle yourself well in most situations. Here are some suggestions for building self-confidence: 1. Be careful about comparing yourself to others. It's fine to have heroes, or a mentor whose positive qualities you strive to emulate, but constantly measuring your status, possessions or looks against others is self-defeating. 2. Make a list of your past successes. Include skills you've mastered, jobs you've performed well, relationships you've nurtured, and milestones you've achieved. These don't have to be monumental accomplishments. 3. Inventory your positive qualities. What are the things you like about yourself? Are you conscientious, generous, funny, a good listener, a faithful friend? 4. Face a challenge and conquer it. Finish a task you've been avoiding, go a week without junk food, settle a dispute with a coworker. For best results, don't tackle too many challenges at one time. 5. Learn something new. If you favor fiction, occasionally read a biography or a science article. Try a new form of exercise. Take an offbeat class. Oscar-winning actor Daniel Day Lewis apprenticed with a cobbler to learn how shoes are made. The pair he ultimately created is proudly displayed in the cobbler's shop. Push back the boundaries and expand your comfort zone. 6. Pursue activities that you love. It's easy to excel at something you enjoy doing, so be sure to tap this natural wellspring of self-confidence and self-esteem. If you don't love your job, get passionate about a hobby or leisure activity. Or consider changing jobs. 7. Take action. You won't develop confidence sitting on the sidelines or backing away from challenges. Regardless of the outcome, taking action is better than succumbing to fear and anxiety. Just do it! Seven Ways to Earn Self-Respect The self-respect component of self-esteem is extremely important, and may be one reason why so many people who have attained success and wealth seem nevertheless troubled and unfulfilled. It's almost impossible to do end runs around your own conscience. As Michael Josephson, President of the Josephson Institute of Ethics (), reminds us, "The happiest people are those who find purpose, meaning and self-respect in pursuing a vision of a good life, guided and measured by enduring moral virtues." Here are some suggestions for building self-respect: 1. Clarify your values. Not life-style values like loving the movies or weekends in the country, but the moral values that guide your life and the decisions you make on a daily basis. 2. Be true to yourself. Don't be unduly swayed by the opinions of others. Protect your integrity by standing firm in your values, making your own decisions, and creating your own life. 3. Strive for self-efficacy: With self-efficacy, you possess a sense of mastery over the events in your life. Developing skills and competencies of any kind can strengthen your ability to stay in charge, making you more willing to take risks and cope with challenges. 4. Give more of yourself. Vow to put 100 percent effort into most endeavors. If you have a tendency to withhold parts of yourself from the people and events around you, work at becoming more fully engaged. 5. Every day, do one specific thing to make the world a kinder, gentler place. Being courteous and respectful to everyone around you is a good start. 6. Moderate perfectionist tendencies. Having extremely high standards for yourself, and feeling repeatedly let down when you don't meet them, can thoroughly undermine self-confidence, self-respect and self-esteem. The tyranny of perfectionism is that it starves self-acceptance. Be a little easier on yourself. 7. Persevere. Don't give up easily. View mistakes as learning opportunities and strive to do better next time. Weigh criticism as objectively as possible and be open to observations that ring true. Stay the course, but make appropriate adjustments. Try This… Invite someone you trust to have a conversation with you about the dual effects of self-confidence and self-respect. Tell the person about a specific action you took within the past week that strengthened your self-confidence. Explain why you think it worked. Then describe something that increased your self-respect. These don't have to be big, weighty incidents. They can be very small moments that only you are aware of. Give the other person an opportunity to share similar experiences. If you don't have someone to talk with, write down your thoughts. careers, Jobs Indonesia, Indonesia Vacancy

No woman is an island

Many businesswomen attribute their success to a mentor or a group of people who’ve advised them in some way. These women realise and acknowledge to themselves that they didn’t necessarily have all the answers, or all the skills and knowledge and contacts to take their business to the next level. They weren’t afraid, or too proud, to approach people who were experts in their field and ask for their help and input.

Jane Hunter, of Hunter’s Wines wanted an effective team but not a top-heavy staff so she relied on the use of consultants in the areas of winemaking, management, accounting, advertising and PR. Jane, whose expertise was as a manager and viticulturist, said “I believe no one person has a monopoly on good ideas, the more people involved managing a business the more innovative you get. All these people work really well together and it gives me confidence to know I can call on them but they’re not actually sitting at the winery.”
When her company experienced a difficult vintage back in 1995 she said her various consultants who were away from the problem could look at the situation quite logically and in a different light than those caught in the middle, getting stressed out. The consultants put together a plan for the company for the next year to work their way through the difficult time.
Julie Dalzell, past publisher and editor of successful Cuisine magazine, called her advisory group a ‘maverick team’ – a handful of advisors with backgrounds in advertising, direct marketing and finance. Julie said her team were lateral thinkers, who helped to generate ideas and make them happen.
“We sat around with our advertising manager and said we’re either going to stay still and battle for the advertising dollar all the time or we’re going to try and beat the pack.”
The team developed a business plan, a marketing plan and an advertising brief containing some fairly challenging goals for the Cuisine team. Part of the plan was an eye catching and controversial advertising campaign that resulted in a 79 percent increase in circulation.

Napoleon Hill in his classic book ‘Think and Grow Rich’ devotes an entire chapter to the power of the Master Mind. He attributes Andrew Carnegie’s and Henry Ford’s success to their master mind alliances.
There are many variations to the Master Mind and they can be easily set up to assist you in your own business. Some of these include:

Advisory Council
Your advisory council could be made up of consultants, key stakeholders or staff, or experts in their respective fields. Their role is to advise and guide you – so you can learn from their mistakes - not to work for you.
An advisory council may also have networks and connections that can be invaluable to you as you grow your business.
Approach and appoint people into key advisory positions; operations, management, marketing, financial. Aim to meet monthly and from the beginning clearly set out each person’s role, responsibility and your expectations as well as their remuneration.

Mastermind/Brainstorming Groups
While publishing Her Business I set up an informal brainstorming group with a group of four or five business owners from a diverse range of businesses. We met every three weeks at my offices over a bottle of wine and nibbles. We each had 20 minutes to raise an issue or problem in our business and the rest of the group would brainstorm or offer suggestions, and then we’d move on to the next person and so on.
The group offered a popular forum where we could explore staff issues, practise presenting proposals, ask for contacts or referrals and get feedback and a different perspective on issues.

Buddy Partners
I’ve also had a ‘goal setting buddy’ – and again we met every three weeks or so. We’d begin with a ‘check in’ of personal happenings. Then we’d take turns updating each other on our progress towards our goals, we’d discuss any obstacles or issues, as well as share successes and we then set actions to complete over the next three weeks. The meetings were informal, but the discipline of meeting, reviewing our progress verbally and planning ahead pushed our goals forward.
We set parameters around our expectation of accountability to each other (how tough were we going to be?) and in the early stages spent the first few meetings defining our goals and getting an understanding of the other person’s vision for themselves and their business.

Running your own business, whether self employed or leading a team, can be lonely but having some type of advisory or sounding board prevents isolation, and injects fresh ideas as well as making you accountable to your vision, so you don’t get side tracked with the trivialities of day to day issues.

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Choosing Between Career and Kids

Michelle Carchrae

Every modern mom has had to decide, whether during the last months of pregnancy, maternity leave or while sitting at her desk at work, "Am I going to stay home with my baby? For how long?" Whether the decision seems easy or difficult, it is important enough to warrant careful thought and some introspection.

Working Mom or Stay at Home Mom?

If you're gazing down at your newborn trying to imagine putting on your work clothes and going out the door again, remember that this not a black or white decision! Choosing to stay at home for a while doesn't mean that you have to stay at home forever, and going back to work either full or part time does not mean that you will miss every special event in your child's life. Remember to keep your eyes peeled for career options that can allow you to find the work/life balance that suits you best, such as freelancing or becoming a contractor, job sharing, part time work, working from home or starting your own business.

Career Decisions Depend on the Age and Needs of Your Child

Apart from your own financial and intellectual needs, your child's needs can be a major factor in making the decision whether to go back to work and when. Certain situations mean that your child is more likely to need you or another dedicated caregiver willing to provide one-on-one care.

• Developmentally and emotionally, an infant needs his mother most during his first year.
• Does your child have an intense temperament, special needs or health issues?
• Are you exclusively breastfeeding your baby? If so, are you willing to pump milk or switch to formula when you go back to work?

Tune Out the Mommy Wars

There is no one right decision to the question of career or kids, so tune out anyone who tells you otherwise. Every mother must make her own decision based on her and her family's current needs, finances and beliefs. Books like Mommy Wars [Random House Trade Paperbacks, 2007. ISBN-10:0812974484] and The Feminine Mistake by Leslie Bennetts [Voice, 2008. ISBN-10: 1401309380] can either be food for thought or fuel for underlying anxieties, so take other people's opinions, no matter how highly regarded, with a very large grain of salt.

If the decision to go back to work or stay home with your baby has been a difficult one, remember that you can always change your mind. It is easy to think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, and sometimes you've got to go over there to see what it's really like. Choosing between career and kids is a choice that you can invent your own answer to by looking into different career options, making new choices as your child grows and most importantly, it's a choice that needs to feel right in your heart.

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Coping With Being a Single Working Mother

Being a single mother and working fulltime is a difficult task facing many women today. It is even more challenging when that mother is sending herself back to school.

Children’s Expectations of Their Parents

Children expect their parents to be around for them in every situation; when they wake up in the mornings, to get them ready for school and be home when they get back. They also expect their parents to be at special events such as sporting activities at school, school fairs, plays, and recitals.

For a single working mother, these expectations of their children can be challenging. Earning enough money to take care of the family is paramount and sacrifices have to be made to fulfill these responsibilities. When the father is not around to help share some of the responsibilities such as alternate in spending quality time with the children, attending their special events and supporting the household financially, then the mother is expected to carry out these roles alone.

This might prove impossible for her at times and guilt can set in. The single mother might feel that she is not being a good parent and that she has let down her child. Here are a few suggestions to try and cope in this difficult role:

Single Mum Takes Day off From Work

If the single mother has a regular 9 – 5 job that sees her off on the weekends, she should make it her priority to spend some quality time with her children. This can be done by doing household chores together. When going to buy groceries, make a trip out of it if possible; take the children along to help with the shopping. Have a movie night and pop some microwave popcorn or some other snacks of the children’s choice and sit with them, watching a movie of their choice.

Dealing With Kids’ Special Events

Make use of vacation and casual leave from work when the child has a special event to attend and try to attend as many as possible. The ones that the parent cannot attend, she should ask a close family member or friend to be present to give moral support to the child.

The weekends can also be used to take the children to places such as museums, the zoo, theme parks, the movies, the beach or any other place of their interest. Also, it is good to include the children in vacation trips locally or abroad where possible.

Since children expect their parents to be around and it is not always possible, it is important for the single mother to make use of her days off from work including vacation leave. As children grow older, they will understand the situation a little more.

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ReConnect Restarts Women's Professional Careers; Mothers Returning to Work Refresh Skills at Ivey School of Business

Michelle Carchrae

Restarting a career that has been put on hold to focus on parenting is a challenging prospect for many women. The Richard Ivey School of Business in London, Ontario, is offering ReConnect, a seven day course for women with management experience who want to re-enter the workforce after spending time focused on other areas of life.

Refresh Business Skills, Practice Goal Setting and Build Confidence

Mary Heisz, Faculty Director, ReConnect describes the program's two main goals as helping women get their confidence back up and refreshing their skills, goals and business knowledge. ReConnect does this by updating skills in finance, marketing and business practices as well as focusing on personal goals and the skills needed to achieve those goals, such as networking, resume writing, interviewing and negotiating. ReConnect is generously sponsored by CIBC, and interview skills are put into practice with mock interviews with CIBC recruiters, who provide valuable feedback that helps women refine their interview technique.

Mothers Overcome Challenges When Returning to a Career

Refreshing business knowledge and interviewing skills are not the only challenges mothers face when returning to work. Knowing how to address the hole in your resume in a positive way, dealing with negative attitudes from people who haven't been away from work and juggling the logistics of work/life balance are all big challenges that women face when they refocus on their careers. Carla Sandrin, a 2008 graduate of the ReConnect program, recently started her own business after 15 years at home. In "ReConnect helped me define what I wanted to do and gave me the tools to create my calling card, to say, 'this is what I can do for you,'" Carla said in a telephone interview on September 22, 2009.

Who Will Benefit Most From ReConnect?

ReConnect focuses on refreshing existing skills in management and finance, so it is best suited to women who have had some previous experience leading people and working with financial records. While the tuition fee has been heavily subsidized by CIBC to bring it down to $3,500, ReConnect recognizes that if a woman has been away from work for some time this fee may still be prohibitive. Additional financial assistance has been made available by CIBC.

Successful Graduates of ReConnect 2008

Judging by the success of the 2008 program, the combination of a comfortable retreat setting and highly skilled professors adds up to an extremely positive experience for the diverse group of participants. "I could not have been more pleased with how participants felt about the program last year," Mary Heisz, Faculty Director, ReConnect said in a telephone interview on September 24, 2009. Despite the challenges of 2008's economic crisis many graduates successfully relaunched their careers, and a few were able to identify their own personal goals well enough to say that they weren't ready to refocus on their career. One even had the confidence to leave a brand-new position and search for another because it wasn't challenging enough for her needs.

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Confronting the Gender Gap in Wages

Written by Deborah Kolb, Judith Williams, and Carol Frohlinger

Tuesday, 14 April 2009 20:22

Women are winning the numbers game in the workforce. They now fill almost half of the country’s managerial jobs. In 1999, about 60% of females, 16 years of age or older, worked outside the home, up from 20% at the turn of the century. Source: Business Week Despite equal representation among the ranks of wage earners, however, women continue to come up short in their paychecks. For the past two decades, optimists could take solace in the narrowing wage gap. For every dollar earned by a white man, a white woman now earns $.78. This figure represents a big improvement from the $.63 white women earned relative to white men in 1975. Source: US Department of Labor But recent trends give us reason for concern. The rate of improvement has slowed dramatically. Working from a lower base, white women made up $.11 in the 1980s, but only $.04 cents during the 1990s. And the statistics are worse for minority women: An African-American woman earns $.67 for every $1 a white man earns, while her Hispanic sister earns only $.56. Source: US Department of Labor The government’s General Accounting Office reports that in seven out of ten industries the gap has actually started to widen. Some gains have held. By 2000 women almost reached parity in educational services, taking home 91 cents on the dollar, up from 86 in 1995.   But the big picture is hardly rosy. Over the same period, for example, a female manager in the entertainment and recreation services earned 62 cents for every dollar a male manager made, down from 83 cents in 1995. Given the data, it’s surprising to discover that by a good margin most female managers think they have reached wage parity with their male colleagues. The statistics are sobering: 70% of female executives think they’re paid as much as males; 78% of men agree. The facts, however, show that women in management take home only 62.7% of what male managers earn   (Source: Gallup, American Management Association). Realities and Myths Behind the Persistent Wage Gap Like all entrenched patterns, the gender gap in wages is supported by both myth and reality. Some of the realities behind the differential require policy changes at the highest levels. Gendered notions of the value of work Traditional "women’s work" tends to be in the helping and support professions. These jobs are not yet considered comparable in worth to the work that men do. Clustering To the degree that women are clustered in lower paying positions, they may not think that they have much bargaining power in bridging the gender gap in pay. They compare their salaries to what other women are making, not to what the job should command. In negotiations, when you don’t think you have much clout and are in a low-power situation, you can be overly reluctant to push for what you are worth Interrupted careers Women are also more likely than men to work part-time, take time off for family reasons, and to be the primary caregivers for their children or aging parents.  This affects not only their take-home pay, but their career opportunities as well. Childless women, for example, currently earn 90% of their male counterparts’ salaries. The myths, however, operate under the surface and color the perception of the wage gag—among men and women. Work is seen as a choice for women, a necessity for men. Forty-one percent of working women head their own households—they are single, divorced, separated or widowed—and 28% have dependent children. Yet American culture still buys into the myth of the male breadwinner. It’s easier to say no to a woman. People—men and women—assume that a woman will sacrifice her own needs for the sake of a good relationship and not push for what’s important to her. When a woman is perceived to be accommodating, it’s harder for her to get others to take her demands seriously or, in parallel, all too tempting to take the path of least resistance and not make them. Money is not a high priority for most women. Money may be only a factor for women in salary negotiations, not the determining one. They may value other elements in a benefit package—time, ability to telecommute, etc. That does not automatically correlate to the prevalent assumption that women don’t care about being paid fairly for the contributions they make. The Cumulative Price Contrary to folk wisdom, women are just as likely as men are to negotiate compensation. The problem is, they don’t realize the same results from their efforts. When men negotiate an entry salary or a raise, they achieve on average a 4.3% increase from the initial figure.  By contrast, when women negotiate, they realize only 2.7% more. This gap adds up. Over the span of a career, the lag translates into about a 35% wage differential that can be traced back to starting salaries. According to a recent study, if current wage patterns continue, a 25-year-old woman, who works full time, will earn $523,000 less than the average 25-year-old man will by the time they both retire at 65. That’s a lot of money. But the discrepancy affects more than a bank account or financial security. Salaries are important. They are a good index of the value an organization puts on your skills and contributions. In turn, they shape an individual’s notion of self-worth. Narrowing the Gap What can an individual woman do when she bumps up against the wage gap? Plenty. Take stock Know precisely what skills, talents, and experience you bring to the table. Pay as much attention to your assets as your weaknesses. Once you identify your weaknesses, don’t dwell on them; consider ways of overcoming them. Get additional training where your skills could use some shoring up; figure out what strengths provide a counterbalance to a perceived weakness. Tie those skills and talents directly to what people are looking for. Benchmark Women often begin negotiations without the solid information about comparable salaries and pay scales that would allow them to be confident the demands they are making are both legitimate and realistic. Instead, they tend to compare their salaries to those of the other women in their field or organization and not to the full band characterizing the field. Find out what your experience and talents command in the marketplace generally—don’t just swap stories with other women. Salary figures are readily available across a wide spectrum on websites like monster.com and hotjobs.com and in university placement offices. Talk widely to others in the industry. Tap your informal networks to find out about a specific company, whether you are thinking about joining its ranks or are up for a performance review. The more you know, the more easily you can defend a salary demand. When you can’t figure out your worth, your chances of getting it are slim. Develop alternatives When you must accept what a prospective employer or a superior puts on the table, you are pretty much at his or her mercy. But if you have the possibility of another job offer or opportunities in other sectors to explore—even if they are not exactly what you want—you still have the luxury of choice. You are not held hostage to another person’s generosity. Aggressively pursue those options; they give you greater flexibility, a better sense of the marketplace for your skills and experience, and confidence in what they are worth. When you meet challenges, this knowledge will help you push back. Set realistic and defensible goals Worries about encouraging unrealistic expectations for future performance can prevent women from setting their goals high and pressing those claims. For a variety of other reasons, women tend to bargain themselves down even before they open discussions.  Instead of mentally whittling away at your demands, set the goals high and then test whether they are defensible, whether they can be supported by performance records and other informational resources. Demonstrate value Especially when the playing field is uneven, you must be prepared to position yourself to advantage. Going into a job interview or a performance review, know what you bring to the table and what you have accomplished. Lay out in specific terms what that experience could or has meant to the company and attach a price tag to it. Think of alternative ways of being compensated, not just a high base salary. Suggest a bonus contingent on performance, for example.  careers, Jobs Indonesia, Indonesia Vacancy

Blaming Women's Choices for the Gender Pay Gap

Written by Hilary M. Lips

Monday, 07 September 2009 22:35

A 2006 article in the New York Times cited labor department statistics that, for college-educated women in middle adulthood, the gender pay gap had widened during the previous decade. The phenomenon was attributed partly to discrimination, but also to “women’s own choices. The number of women staying home with young children has risen …. especially among highly educated mothers, who might otherwise be earning high salaries.” A 2007 report from the American Association of University Women sounded the alarm about a continuing wage gap that is evident even in the first year after college graduation. The authors noted, however, that individual choices with respect to college major, occupation, and parenthood have a strong impact on the gap. Accepting the idea that much of the pay gap can be accounted for by such neutral factors as experience and training, they concluded that, in the first year after college graduation, about 5 percent of the pay gap is unexplained by such factors—and it is that 5 percent that represents the impact of discrimination. The language attributing women’s lower pay to their own lifestyle choices is seductive—in an era when women are widely believed to have overcome the most serious forms of discrimination and in a society in which we are fond of emphasizing individual responsibility for life outcomes. Indeed, it is possible to point to a variety of ways in which women’s work lives differ from men’s in ways that might justify gender differences in earnings. Women work in lower-paid occupations; on average they work fewer paid hours per week and fewer paid weeks per year than men do; their employment is more likely than men’s to be discontinuous. As many economists with a predilection for the “human capital model” would argue, women as a group make lower investments in their working lives, so they logically reap fewer rewards. At first blush, this argument sounds reasonable. However, a closer look reveals that the language of “choice” obscures larger social forces that maintain the wage gap and the very real constraints under which women labor. The impact of discrimination, far from being limited to the portion of the wage gap that cannot be accounted for by women’s choices, is actually deeply embedded in and constrains these choices. Do women choose lower-paid occupations? Women continue to be clustered in low-paid occupational categories: office and administrative support and various service jobs. While they now make up a majority of university students, they are concentrated in academic specialties that lead to lower paid occupations: education rather than engineering, for example. If women persist in choosing work that is poorly paid, shouldn’t the responsibility for the wage gap be laid squarely at their own doorstep? Actually, within groups graduating with particular academic majors, women earn less than men, as illustrated in the AAUW report cited above. And within occupational categories, women earn less than their male counterparts, as revealed in this chart. Furthermore, there is a catch-22 embedded in women’s occupational choices: the migration of women into an occupation is associated with a lowering of its status and salary, and defining an occupation as requiring stereotypically masculine skills is associated with higher prestige, salary, and discrimination in favor of male job applicants. So convincing women in large numbers to shift their occupational choices is unlikely to obliterate the earnings gap. As well, using the language of choice to refer to women’s career outcomes tacitly ignores the many subtle constraints on such decisions. From childhood onward, we view media that consistently portray men more often than women in professional occupations and in masculine-stereotyped jobs. Not surprisingly, researchers find that the more TV children watch, the more accepting they are of occupational gender stereotypes. Why does the acceptance of gender stereotypes matter? Gender-stereotyped messages about particular skills (e.g., “males are generally better at this than females”) lower women’s beliefs in their competence—even when they perform at exactly the same level as their male counterparts. In such situations, women’s lower confidence in their abilities translates into a reluctance to pursue career paths that require such abilities. So, there are many problems with treating women’s occupational choices as based purely on individual temperament and as occurring within a static occupational system that is unaffected by such choices. Women’s employment choices are systematically channeled and constrained—and when women elude the constraints and flow into previously male-dominated jobs, the system apparently adapts to keep those jobs low-paid. If women chose to work more hours, would they close the gap? Women work fewer paid hours per week than men do, but among workers who labor more than 40 hours per week, women earn less than men. Indeed, among workers working 60 hours or more per week at their primary job, women earned only 82% of men’s median weekly earnings in 2006. Furthermore, women do not necessarily choose to work fewer hours than men do. One researcher found that 58% of workers want to change their work hours in some way—and that 19% of women report they want the opportunity to work more hours Also, women have recently brought lawsuits against corporations such as Boeing and CBS claiming discrimination in access to overtime. Thus, in the realm of hours worked for pay, it is probably a mistake to use the number of hours worked as a simple indicator of women’s (or men’s) choices. As in the case of occupational segregation by gender, the number of hours worked reflects some systematic constraints. Choosing parenthood means lower wages only for women. For women, having children has a negative effect on wages, even when labor market experience is taken into account. This may be due to mothers’ temporary separation from the workforce and/or the loss of the benefits of seniority and position-specific training, experience, and contacts. Among married persons working full-time, the ratio of women’s to men’s median weekly earnings is 76.4% for those with no children under the age of 18, but only 73.6% for those with children. And when women and men of all marital statuses are considered together, women with children under 18 earn 97.1% of what women without children earn, whereas men with children under 18 earn 122% of what men without children earn. So, the choice to have children is associated with very different earnings-related outcomes for women and men. In terms of children, it is not that women and men are making different choices, but that the same choices have very different consequences for the two groups. Those consequences reflect society’s failure to value the work of parenting. Yet, if most women decided to forego motherhood, the declining birthrate already causing concern in some parts of the developed world would soon become catastrophic. Women’s choices are not the problem. Individual women can sometimes evade the effects of the gender pay gap by making certain kinds of choices, such as selecting male-dominated occupations, working more hours, avoiding parenthood. However, these choices occur in an environment suffused with subtle sexism and discrimination: there are more barriers for women than for men to making certain choices, and the consequences of some choices are starkly different for women and men. Moreover, these individual solutions are not effective on a societal level; they work only if the women enacting them remain in a minority. For example, if most women moved into jobs that are now male-dominated, signs are that the salaries associated with those jobs would likely drop. But, by making it difficult to go against the tide, the forces of discrimination ensure that most women don’t move into such jobs. And as long as a few women get past the barriers, the illusion persists that any woman could do it if she wanted to—it’s a matter of free choice. However, women’s choices will not be free until their abilities and their work are valued equally with men’s, and until women and men reap equivalent consequences for their choices in the realm of work and family. careers, Jobs Indonesia, Indonesia Vacancy