Once upon a time, men were the bread earners, or meat hunters…. basically food provider of the family where as women were confined (then, this was not termed as ‘confinement’ guess, this word was coined much later) to the household chores. Woman were quite satisfied and occupied with their work so were the men…they shared a happy, peaceful existence. A balanced life. Right?
Today, men still are the ones who get the money but with the concept of double salaried family coming up the roles of women have undergone a change. Now, their responsibilities encompass both the home front as well as juggling the similar office hours, tensions, backbiting, politicking of the work place.
The so-called feminists would have had never thought of this changed equation in their wildest dreams. They won the battle, agreed. But, the war is still to be won.
Because, here we are not only dealing with an eon long patriarchal entrenched male psyche but also we are treading on thin ice in terms of the ‘victim’.
You simply cannot afford to start on the offensive till the female gender is herself sure about what she wants.
When asked about whether she prefers a husband who would lend a helping hand (sharing equal responsibilities is too much to ask for even as a wish) to the household chores, no one would ever give an answer in the negative. Right?
So, lets try and peek at the households who despite all the odds do share ‘An Equal responsibility’ balance like mine Oops! …. Us.
My husband, in fact both of us, come from an average income family, have been brought up with the usual gender equations. But, since we are both MBA’s from the same institute, same batch, working in the same organization, earning the same pay package.. we pride ourselves as being the new jet age couple.
So, my husband tries his very best to help me at every step, every domain, each and every work.
Blessing? Nopes, a disaster!
Before you start on ‘Oh, how wonderful, wish I was in your shoes..’ Let me explain.
The day starts at exactly 7: 35 am. Even a minute lost, can lead to irrevocable consequences.
I try my very best to reach the kitchen before he does. Why? Is that the question? Because, the day my hubby tries his hands on cooking…(His culinary skills just barely somehow manages to boast a few dishes like omelets/toast/tea/coffee….) we never ever reach office on time.
As I have to first clean up the mess AND then start afresh.
So, practically his help costs us a lot in terms of salary deducted for half day.
Evenings are worse. Since, both of us are half dead hence any inefficiency at his end leads to a cat- fight.
He, in the end, declares that he would never ever even try to offer any help.
Yuppee…. That’s it!
But, this feeling does not last till the next morning when my ever conscious husband forgetting all about the gender equations, the job division, the feminist movement… gets up and asks .. Tea or Coffee?
By Minal Srivastava
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